China: The Fourth Email

9:10 AM CST on Thursday, Sept. 16th, 9:10 PM HKT on Thursday, Sept 16th Weigh! Today was another day of visiting factories. Another day, new adventures. We revisited the Dangwing factory. On Tuesday, we had asked them to make a few changes to the samples they produced for us. We had to inspect them today. They did good. Then we went to Bright Harvest Company. We didn’t take a factory tour because we work with them so much. Since we are their biggest customer, Ted trusts the factory and didn’t need to see anything. Instead, we went to lunch… I do not understand how Chinese people are so thin. At first, I thought it was because they used chop sticks, and put once piece of food in their mouth at a time. But, here, chop sticks are used more like shovels, herding as much food into their mouths as possible. They eat big meals too, and everything is served family style on a lazy Susan. Today we ate chicken feet, fish head, tofu, shrimp, crab noodles, fried rice, Chinese pie, steamed spinach, and spicy beef. No, I did not try the chicken feet. In fact, I tried not to look at the chicken feet. The fish head came fully intact. It looked like it had been dropped into a pot of boiling water screaming (just keep swimming, just keep swimming). Then there was the shrimp. I am pretty sure these were also dunked into a pot of boiling water alive. They came served with their feet, their heads with eyeballs, their tentacles, everything they needed to survive. I politely turned the lazy Susan past me, which prompted the waitress to come serve the shrimp to me. Two shrimp, on my plate, staring at me with their black beady eyes. Instead of pushing them aside, I did what any good communist would do. I ripped off their heads, stripped them of their shell, their feet, their dignity and ate them. They were so good, so I helped myself to two more! Then there was the Chinese pie. This was not a dessert, but a sesame pie filled with Chinese ingredients I could not identify. It was baked on a doily that made the pie hard to retrieve with my chopsticks. It was a slippery little sucker too. As I struggled to get the pie onto my plate, I hear “Come Chao, Sa Da Ma! Ya Ya, Ooodang La!” or something along those lines. I look up, and John, the Dangwing factory owner, is motioning to Champion, our driver, to put the pie on my plate for me. Before I knew it, Champion leaps to my rescue. I am sure I turned bright red. Damn those chop sticks and my lack of coordination. Thank god they didn’t offer me a fork! Over the past three days, I have experienced a lot of Chinese customs. They are very polite. They always open the doors for me, constantly make sure I have something to drink, and make up my hotel room every time I leave. They also love to say thank you, shake your hand, wave good bye, and nod a lot. Then there are the more unique traditions. When you cheers, you are supposed to chug your drink. John loved to cheers at lunch. He also loved to chug his beer. Ted informed me that I don’t need to chug my beer or my tea, I can just politely take a sip. Glad I could be an exception to the rule, I didn’t want to be carried out of the restaurant at noon. Another interesting custom are the hot napkins you are served at meal time. The first one is for your hands, the second is for your face. Why do you need to wipe off your face before you eat?? I did not take part in this activity. No need for me to eat without my make-up on, I don’t want to upset anyone’s stomach! Ok I am exhausted, we leave for Hong Kong in the morning. I can’t wait! Good bye my beautiful hotel. Love you! Lauren PS – I think I have found the root cause of pollution. It does not come from the factories, but from Chinese food. The gas I was emitting last night after dinner definitely polluted my room. If they just change their diets, and try not to serve foreigners their local fare, and all smog issues will be solved. PSS – ‘Weigh’ means hi in Chinese. ‘Mayo-tea’ means no problem. And, ‘Nigga’ must mean something along the lines of like or um because they use that word all the time. I would strongly advise against any Chinamen hanging around the south side of Chicago. PSSS – I never want to eat Chinese food again.